My amazing husband David wrote his first blog post! Please take a minute to read his message about being a Dad to an amazing little boy…
So, about a month ago, Gavin’s Voice, as a blog was launched. To say it was introduced as a well-planned project and built around a grand plan would be, well, not so true. But, then again, while the idea of it isn’t new to us, the goals of it and other things we’re thinking of doing are in their infancy, to say the least. But I will say this, sometimes it’s just better to jump into the pool and get to it. The day this was introduced was perhaps one of the hardest days of my beautiful wife, Joreen’s, life. I know it sounds dramatic but it’s true! We hope to share, maybe inspire, teach, and most of all support families just like ours!
First, let me back up a bit. So I’m Gavin’s father, David….. I’m a lucky man, to say the least. I’m married to an amazing and beautiful woman, I have three daughters that I love so much that when they hurt, I do too and I’m also a dad to a special kid who in 5 minutes can take me through ANY emotion you can name and maybe even some new ones too. I have a career that I really love but it forces me to travel at least 2 weeks a month so that’s a lot of fun with what our family needs and deals with at times. But this circus is our life and I’m lucky to have it. Someday, we’ll share the name of this circus with everyone. We just met, so I have to be on my best behavior. My goal in this corner of Gavin’s Voice will be to support the dads among us and maybe offer a little different perspective to our daily lives.
Back to the day, this started. I was out of town, and it was just one of those days. You know, we all have them. Just pushed to every limit and every bit of patience was well used up. Where was I? I was in a hotel someplace. Ya, not fair at all to those back at the center tent of the circus for sure. Hopefully, momma doesn’t mind me sharing but the text messages got worse as the day went on. It’s a challenge, he’s tough, OMG, I won’t be here when you get home or even, I quit. All said out of frustration, not with this beautiful child but at his challenge which is Autism. No one planned or prepared for this!
As a dad, we’re supposed to always be tough, able to fix anything, and not at all emotional. Well, that’s garbage. Of course, I want to be all that but I’m also human and I won’t apologize for it, ever. I love my family, I love all of them so much, and being away sucks bad enough but when days like this happen, it’s horrible. Of course, it’s easier on me because I’m not there in the moment, but that guy who wants to be strong and fixes stuff feels caged and useless. I can’t kiss away the pain like a scrapped knee and the resulting hurt that lasts much longer than a sucker or popsicle is just brutal. I can try to empathize and listen, but inside, I want to just scream and then fix it all. As we know, there is no fixing Autism but finding that sweet spot where we all get along with it is the best we can hope for some days.
So, I’m going to do my best to find the sweet spot. I want to support and understand all I can. I want to be there for my family as an advocate, as a good dad and husband equally. But I need help. Don’t we all just need a little help with this?
My goal is to learn and share that with others. It’s to network with other families and especially dads of special needs kids. I think we (dads) all have a unique perspective and the dads voices in my research don’t seem to be out there as much as I would have expected. So, this is just a start and I really look forward to meeting as many people as I can! So, stay tuned and reach out, please!
Leave a Reply